Nancy

I think mine is a fairly ordinary abortion story. At the age of 21, I had a 34-year-old boyfriend. I consistently used contraception, but a single lapse in using my diaphragm resulted in pregnancy.

“Mostly I felt a huge relief.”

Neither of us wanted a child. He was struggling to co-parent a child with his ex-wife; he was not completely faithful to me; we had no long-term plans for commitment. We were both working low-wage jobs. I was depressed and smoking a lot of weed.

We went to Planned Parenthood, and he paid the $300 fee that I did not have. The brief counseling session there boiled down to: “Are you sure you want to have an abortion?” – “Yes, I am sure” – “No reservations about it?” – “No reservations.” I had the procedure at 12 weeks, the earliest possible date it was offered at that time.

I had a small amount of sadness while waiting – which was more about not having a truly loving mate than it was about not having a baby. Mostly I felt a huge relief. The procedure itself was quick, uncomplicated, and painless. My boyfriend was supportive and expressed no regrets whatsoever.

From a young age, I independently considered abortion issues, and I have always been pro-choice. I have never believed that abortion was wrong. In my way of thinking, the tiny fetus I carried never knew life, so life was not lost. I believed that every child should be a wanted child. I knew at the time that I would not be a good parent, and I did not want to screw up a child’s life.

I stopped seeing that boyfriend, and I worked on becoming happier. I stopped using drugs, went back to school, and began a rewarding professional career. I dated some, and then, at 34, I met and married a loving man, and we made a happy life together. We consistently used condoms and spermicide until we were ready to parent, and together we made a very much wanted and beloved daughter, who is now 20 years old. Now, at 58 years old, I have zero regrets about having an abortion. Zero. I made the right choice for me.