Deborah

This issue is about agency and the right of ALL people in a democracy to have dominion over their own bodies. Anti-choice efforts come down to power and to keeping women—particularly women without money and resources—in their place.

I know there is the argument about taking an unborn life. I respect the beliefs of people who feel that way, but those beliefs should not limit the rights of others to choose what is best for them at a given moment in time. To me, saving a living woman or girl’s life trumps saving a fetus. And by that I mean not only their health, but their future life – their dreams, plans, potential.

“I am horrified at my 21-year-old self. However, I grew up and found my voice during those seven years.”

You ask about individual experiences: I married right out of college in 1972. I had been accepted into a graduate program at Harvard, and it broke my heart to let that dream go. I suppose I was too young and too much of a product of my time to stand up for myself and refuse marriage to someone I already knew I did not care for. He was ten years older, it was what he wanted and I went along.

Thinking of this now – I am horrified at my 21-year-old self. However, I grew up and found my voice during those seven years. I am thankful every day that abortion was legal during the ’70s at which time I voluntarily terminated two pregnancies. I extricated myself from an unhappy situation, and luckily went on to attain that PhD, have a career, remarry, and give birth to two children who were truly wanted.

These children had the benefit of my maturity and contentment, my desire for and ability to nurture them. My entire life, professional and personal, would not have existed if someone had forced me to have children with the man to whom I was married in my 20s.

I’m sure I would have loved those children, but not the life they and I would have settled for. I should add that I was luckier than many of my high school friends who had illegal abortions or put children up for adoption in the ’60s, before Roe v. Wade.  Two had botched abortions and could never have children. How painful to pay your whole life for a mistake made when you were so young and unformed.

I fervently hope society does not regress, and that we continue to fight for the need for safe abortions, family counseling, and women’s health. In the end, it comes down to equality for the sexes so that women can rise to the height of their abilities.